Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
