Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
