i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
This is my life. Enjoy the view
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
