she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
As shirtless as possible
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I could fuck to npr.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
