They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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