I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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