You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
