so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
there's paper in my vomit.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
