JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
