sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
