My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
