'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
