This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Randomize
