Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I accidentally burped into my bong.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
My dick has a subreddit
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Randomize
