i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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