yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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