I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
