this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
