Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
