i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
