Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
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