We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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