So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize