New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Randomize
