Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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