Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Randomize
