hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
