Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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