i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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