Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
It's rum buckets o'clock
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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