bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
