the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
