these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
