so that wasnt chicken after all
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize