Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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