I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
