well I can't set my house on fire every night
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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