whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
