i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
