Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
