You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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