I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
