yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Randomize
