So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Is her dick bigger than yours?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
