I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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