The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
