Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
