Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Randomize
