hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
