You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize