talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
