my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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